Types of orgasm in women

At least there are four types of orgasm in women.

Clitoral orgasm
In the past, we did not know that women need clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. Now, stimulation of this organ is often used for women to reach orgasm.

Vaginal orgasms
This type of involving an area called the G-spot and other sensitive parts inside the vagina. Orgasms are very different and are physically able to feel more and more intense depending on the ability of couples to play its role. But clearly, when you reach it, your energy rather than decrease, even increased.

Multiple orgasm
When a serial sexual intercourse took place and taste you get peaks of pleasure (orgasm) several times like a strand of pearls that line, it is called multiple orgasms.

The whole body orgasm
Indeed very rarely experienced by most women. It was not that difficult to achieve. With proper training, women, even men, can feel it. It can take up to 30 minutes, although a few minutes also. The important thing to remember is the trauma of the past and our inability to remove all thoughts about work, relationships with friends, family, and other problems become the most significant obstacles to achieve orgasm. Therefore, remove and enjoy until you really orgasm.

Successful Sex -- Use It Well

Sex is for self-expression and for human bonding. You also want to develop your sexual technique. This article is not about that.

In today's world where so many now can express their sexuality without that much inhibition or moral censure by society, we have opened the gates to freedom of sexual expression.

Remember that it was not so long ago that children in families were told not to touch their genitals and were beaten if they were caught masturbating. The young women were also shamed if they got pregnant as teenagers.

This was an attack on living the existence of the body based on religions attacking the body to prove that they offered spiritual salvation and control for making people good to enter the afterlife.

These mentally unbalanced attitudes have been seen for what they are in modern times: anti-body, anti-existence on earth, anti-passion and anti-feeling, and anti-self-decision making.

In today's world young people should be able to make decisions themselves as to how they express themselves in a body.

Sex is self-expression and its is bonding between two human beings. These are its two primary functions. A third would be baby-making, but now only for a few in modern cultures. Sexual expression as a need has gone far beyond baby-making in modern societies.

Why do most of us have such an enormous interest in sex, stated or unstated?

THE PSYCHOLOGY BEHIND SEXUAL INTEREST

• sexual orgasm, especially shared sexual orgasm, often gives one a sense of tremendous vitality and passion and opens the door to shared feelings between two human being.
• sexual intercourse together is often taken as the true marriage contract. It is assumed that once a couple starts mating together they are then to remain a couple together, sharing their lives
• however, in today's modern society, to get to experience someone as a possible intimacy partner it is considered important to go to bed together and do some heavy sexual sporting. Thus many use the sexual compatibility and mutual passion as a measure of their being compatible in other ways of sharing life together
• we feel in love with someone who may feel in love with us. This is usually interpreted as that we are meant for each other. Love, undefined but felt, is taken as some sort of destiny bonding. Thus most of us are waiting and hoping for the big love to come our way so that we can settle down with the right partner for us
• Jungian psychologists have found that falling in love is a big projection of our inner need for unity. We identify usually with the archetype of the genitals we carry and project the opposite archetype onto another person with opposite genitals. Masculine and Feminine. This is all as nature intended. Without sex as the motivator how many would choose to live together in such close proximity as to evoke all the human emotions?

The above points go beyond genital and body fascination. Of course we worship our young years when we had full vitality because we know our vitality is not lasting. We age and we die. Nature wants the next generation produced, and that is done with mutual, sexual orgasm.

STAGES OF SEXUAL RELATING AND EXPRESSION

Since sex is such a powerful force in our lives we would do well to make such a force conscious in our lives.

• starting out we experience auto-eroticism. We feel good in our bodies, especially with human contact, thus explaining why little children often love the hugging contact with the parents and family members.
• we progress from auto-eroticism into co-eroticism. We share sexual intensity and bodily contact with others, whether as football players jumping onto each other in a pile after winning a game or with pairs of humans of either and both sexes mating with each other in genital contact. Co-eroticism gets us relating closely with other human beings.
• we develop in co-eroticism relational skills, how to interest someone in being mutual with us, how to release ourselves more and more freely in the sexual embrace, how to share intimacies and other areas of life-expression together.
• we develop non-eroticism. Half the adults in modern society do not live with anyone. They have either regressed to auto-eroticism, having been possibly traumatized in co-eroticism experiences, or they have become non-erotic.
• non-erotic adults put their creative energies towards achieving goals, projects, achievements. Some also go non-erotic by having dogs as pets, the faithful positive feeling function.

What all this is saying is that sexual expression should be used consciously and well. If you can agree with the above points you can then be more aware in how you make your sexual choices in life.

ONE EXAMPLE OF MISUSE OF SEXUALITY

One young man who worked with me would always ask a new woman he met all about her father. He said from this he could tell whether he could seduce her or not.

This was a man who was auto-erotic in co-erotic situations. He did not give and receive in mutual sharing with another human being. He was strictly a predator. He did not like my challenging him on this.

Yes, misuse of sexuality, his own and the other person's.

It's not, don't do things. In an age of self-responsibility and free expression you and I may have done a lot of exploring to see what the world is all about and also ourselves in a body. Yet at some point we need to move beyond unconscious exploration into realistic awareness and take full responsibility for how our self-expression affects others and ourselves.

SEXUAL RELATING GUIDELINES

• if you are sharing sex with someone be honest about your motives and your experiences, and encourage the other person to be so likewise.
• don't hang onto the sexual experience as the goal of your relating with someone.
• there is only one great goal in intimate relating and that is to share lives together with the right person that this is possible to do so with.
• therefore in your sexual expression you will need to redefine yourself as seeking a full intimacy with someone you respect, admire and dance well together with, metaphorically and actually.
• it is not easy to find a full intimacy person for you, so you need to have a committed focus to do so, even if it takes a few years. If you have sex with a number of people as part of your exploration, be honest about your experience and keep looking for that realistic relationship in which you can both fully share the essentials together.
• sex will not get you there to the full relationship, but it certainly is part of the process because of the emotions and vulnerability evoked.
• thus holding off on sexual intimacy before marriage is not usually an effective method for finding the right person for you, and you for them. You need physical and emotional experience together and not just a talk relationship.

The other clear point that marriage counselors have found is that you two need to be able to communicate in harmony at several levels. They are as follows. You can use this list to evaluate your own mating behavior and what you are going for in life. You can use this list to see if you are using your sexuality well.

-communicate openly and honestly. If you are strangers to each other because one or both of you are hiding your true feelings and instead playing roles, then you should not be together. It's too defensive a situation to allow for fulfillment of expression and to allow love to flourish.

-carry the dance of your interactions into the basic areas of relating. It's the same as sex in bed to also cook meals together in the kitchen.

-have at least five areas of mutual sharing and compatibility. These can include:

BASICS OF SEXUAL AND RELATING COMPATIBILITY

• relatively the same level of intelligence
• the same level of fitness and working at fitness
• the same level and way of communication
• no blaming, manipulating and demanding with the other person
• ability to relax together without being a pressure on the other person
• ability to handle together the relationship as also an economic unit of mutual sharing of income and expenses according to each his and her ability
• the sharing of vulnerability, mistakes, wounds, fears, traumas from the past
• the ability to work through interaction difficulties, including such things as affairs or freedom to be alone, whatever it is that may weaken the relationship you both have chosen
• doing chores and other work together so that both of you carry the load pretty equally of work needed to live life together and progress into the future

In a nutshell! Use your sexual attractiveness and expression to form an ongoing intimate relationship, preferably living together, that has all of the above points working for you both.

We add also that if you are partnered with somebody and you do not have the relating experiences as indicated above, then why are you both still together? Split up and use your attractiveness and relationship commitment to explore and then find someone else to be with that will allow more fully the above values.

source: http://ezinearticles.com/

Wake up Your Lazy Sex Life

If your approach to sex is more Hokey Cokey than Kama Sutra, it could be time for a rumpo rethink. Forget fear or the fumbling of a novice: the worst passion killer in the world is indifference.

GOING SOLO

New research from John Hopkins University, USA, shows if you want better moves and orgasms in bed, the best person to practise on is yourself.

Masturbation and sexual fantasies help sustain your desire to have sex so put aside the blushes and experiment.

Vary the ways you touch yourself and where you do it - don't get stuck in a solo sexual rut where only one specific thing will bring you to orgasm.

Not only will you learn what turns you on most, you'll be able to point your partner in the right direction too.

POSITION PARANOIA

Contrary to some sexperts' advice, you don't have to wrap your legs around your head to have a good time in bed.

Most of us work around five key positions we like because a) they work and b) we can do them.

Fair enough - but you might like to know that you can vary most positions with just a small movement and turn something ordinary into a whole new sexual experience.

For example, if you're a missionary fan, lie on your back as usual but keep your legs closer together and straight as your man penetrates you. This will give you major clitoral stimulation.

If the doggie position is more your style try these simple variations:

• Lower yourself down onto your elbows, this will change the depth of penetration.
• Kneel against the side of the bed, resting your torso on the bed so you don't have to support your weight and can relax more.
• Lean over the bed supporting your weight on folded arms with your head on a pillow. Your fella should then come up to you in a standing position and lift your legs up to his waist and enter you from behind.

THE BIG O

The good news for all lazy girls is that trying harder won't actually help you achieve orgasm.

If you're anxious, tense or pushing too hard, your orgasm will move further out of reach.

There are moves you can work on to give yourself a head start though. Take the CAT or Coital Alignment Technique, for example.

Your man gets on top of you and lines up his pelvis over yours. This means he lies higher up your body than usual, resting on elbows, so that when he enters you he's riding high and will press your pubic bone and clitoris as he thrusts.

You then push up with your pelvis as he pushes down. If you press against each other as you do it and keep your pace steady, an orgasm will be yours for the taking not faking.

MORNING HAS BROKEN

The morning after the night before is a minefield of potential disasters.

Guarantee you'll see each other again by:

• Having a sense of humour about the night before.
• Telling him you had a great time.
• Giving him a time frame for another date.
• Being nice (even if you're Miss Grumpy in the mornings).
• Not freaking out about the fact you had sex.

KINKY ROOTS

While you may not be interested in whipping your bloke into a sexual frenzy or dressing up as a French maid, you're probably more than a little curious about kinky sex and what it can do for your sex life.

While it's definitely not for everyone, adding a kinky twist is the fastest way to add a bit of zing to your sexual encounters.

Try one (or all!) of the following ways to get kinky without trying too hard:

• Access his best fantasy and act it out for him.
• Drop some naked pictures of yourself into his lap.
• Write him a filthy love letter and leave it in his diary or bag.
• Buy some handcuffs and leave them hanging from the bed.
• Go on a sex-starvation diet where all you can do is talk about it all week.

source: Book "Lazy Girl's Guide to Good Sex", Author Anita Naik

Fantasy Time in Your Sexlife

Fantasy is an important part of sexual life. When fantasy is positive and pleasing it can add something to a person's life.

Fantasy can be a substitute for sex which involves physical contact; it can lead to sex; or it can bring extra pleasure to your sex life. Fantasy can be a very private way of enjoying thoughts which we are not able or would not wish to act out in reality.

Most people fantasize when they masturbate, and many do so when they are having sex with a partner. This can create problems for some people because they feel that they are somehow betraying their partner and feel guilty about this. There are also situations when people feel guilty about what their fantasies are. However, the fact that people have fantasies does not mean that they will cat them out. It is important to remember that fantasies are NOT reality -- they are fantasy, and can be a helpful part of your sex life.

You and your partner can play games with your fantasies, if you are not too embarrassed to share them.

• You could each make a list of your fantasies and discover which ones please you both
• You could write a sexy story for yourself and your partner

There are other games you can play to find out new ways of pleasing each other:

• Consider telling each other all the different turn on's or exotic things you can think of
• Thinking of these in terms of safer sex could give you some new and exciting ideas
• You might take turns experimenting with acceptable and safe ideas from each other's lists
• You might think about all the ways you can have an orgasm without coming inside your partner
• If you have telephone extensions, use them to talk to each other about what kind of sex you like, or try writing sexy letters to each other
• Try playing forfeits, strip poker...

Fantasy Role Play

Such personal sharing needs to be done in a caring and sensitive way. Pretending to be a favourite character or role can be fun, liberating and give us erotic fantasies to work with.We can imagine, dress-up, create an atmosphere, role-play, talk dirty and tell our lover what we want.

Fantasy role play is liberating for those who find it difficult to let themselves go, and to express their real needs. Submerged in the identity of a fantasy character, it is easier to voice desires that are difficult to say in day-to-day life. Some role ideas such as:
" American spy and Russian spy
" Call girl and client
" Civilian and cop
" Frenchmaid and millionaire
" Gynaecologist and patient
" Librarian and bookworm
" Photographer and model
" Teacher and student
" Widow and gardener

If you're ready to tell your idea, lure him to the bedroom with the promise of revealing your filthiest fantasy. You'll be surprised how liberating it can be telling him you've imagined having sex doggy fashion with the plumber! Talk about the fantasy in detail, how you've imagined it coming about and all the things you've got up to in your imagination. Then it's his turn to reveal his filthiest fantasy.

Remember, you do have to be prepared for him to say he fancies the next-door neighbour too. This is a very good exercise for couples - it's a sharp, shocking reminder that we're all individual sexual people with individual sexual thoughts, but if it's done tactfully you shouldn't hurt each other. Rather, the idea is to excite each other. And once you're both turned on from all this dirty talking, share a fantasy together, making it up as you go along. Fantasy can't harm and creates a wonderful shared intimacy. Make love as you fantasise together. That was worth waiting for, wasn't it?!

Dressing Up

Imagine yourself arriving home to find your lover seductively dressed for a night of passion. But how they are dressed will depend on individual taste.

Anything goes here: uniforms, fantasy characters, movie or rock stars. Extend the dressing up with a fantasy scenario and really enter into the game. Or use clothing to create a mood: try a short skirt without panties, a see-through shirt with no bra, or go to bed in suspenders and stockings.

To add to the sexual tension, add a new rule such as not being allowed to touch each other at all. Even hand-holding is forbidden. The idea is to create the exciting barriers that are in place when a couple hardly know each other and are desperate for physical contact. Think it sounds simple? Well, to make it just that bit harder you have to stay at home and you wear something wildly provocative.

For her, what about an all-in-one catsuit or black body stocking to prowl around in? Both are sexy and stylish, making the wearer look and feel gorgeously sleek. For something less obvious, try fishnet or sheer stockings, either stay up style or with built in garter. These are a favourite for wearing both at home, and when dressed for a great night out. For an added dash of excitement during a formal or social evening, it's hard to beat stockings without panties. If you both know the state of semi-undress she's in, the night out may be shorter than planned.

The Male’s Passion

Libido simply means sexual desire. It is man’s erotic arousal and wish, or intense physical or sexual attraction or craving. It can also be classified as the urge to create life. It is naturally manifested through sex.

However, it is also technically considered to be the free, creative or psychic energy an individual has to put toward personal development, or individuation. Sigmund Freud coined the term and pointed out that libido is the instinctual energy or force that can come into conflict with the conventions of civilized behavior. He further claimed that libido has to be transformed into socially useful energy, through the process of "sublimation."

A man’s libido is different from that of a woman as a man tends to respond to spontaneity, visual stimulation like pornography, and just having a willing partner whilst the latter prefers being romanced, talking, intimacy and lots of time spent with their partner before the sex stuff happens. A man does not seem to be affected by a bad day or fatigue when it comes to sex however there are prevalent cases on men having low libido because of certain factors that affect their interest in sex.

Reduction in libido however can also be the result from psychological causes such as loss of intimacy, stress, distraction or depression. Apart from these, loss of libido may also be derived from the presence of environmental stressors such as prolonged exposure to elevated sound and high levels or bright light.

Physical and psychological causes loss of libido
Although the loss of libido is rare to men, there are physical and psychological causes that are common and more often neglected. Among the physical causes are:

• alcoholism
• abuse of drugs
• anemia
• hyperprolactinaemia
• obesity
• prescribed drugs particularly Proscar (finasteride) a tablet used for prostate problems
• other antidepressants and recreational drugs
• low male hormone level (testosterone)
• any major 'generalized' disease, such as diabetes

On the other hand, the more common issues about are the attributes of psychological causes:

• depression
• stress and overwork
• sex hang-ups
• latent gayness
• serious relationship problems with the wife/partner

Commercial pills and creams

So far, there hasn’t been any magic remedy or cure for the loss of libido on men however there are a lot of commercial pills and creams that alleviate the diminishing sexual desire. But what’s more recommended by physician are proper nutrition, rest and exercise, moderation on vices and more importantly, re-establishing intimate connection with the partner.

It is NOT normal for a man to have no sexual desire and he is being irresponsible if he refuses to get professional help or refuses to work on this dilemma with his wife or his partner. Bottom line, he is saying that he is not interested in saving himself from absolute uselessness. So brother, start facing the problem so that you can once again enjoy the fullness of life!

source: http://www.sexualhealthcare.net/

What Can You Do To Boost Your Libido?

There are many women that will wonder if there is anything that can be done. Sometimes, we think that this is just normal and try to forget about it. Yet, there is not a reason to do that. In fact, those women that are experiencing a loss of sex should consider a women’s libido enhancer.

There are several natural products on the market that are women’s libido enhancers. These can improve the sexual desires that a woman has and also can enhance intimate relationships. They work because they address the hormonal imbalances in order to get the body moving in the right direction again.

Safe women’s libido enhancers often come in the form of herbal supplements. Here are some of the herbs that can help with improving the sex drive in women.

· Sabal Serrulata: this is the biological name for the herb Saw Palmetto. This herb can be used to treat both male and female low libido conditions. It works by triggering the body to produce the right hormones to aid in sexual drive.

· Sarsaparilla: herb used as a sexual and rejuvenating tonic.

· Genitiana Lutea Radix Powder: this herb is used for a total well being that promotes the optimum use of all organs in the body. It helps by allowing them to function at the highest level possible.

· Turnaria Aphrodisiaca: it is generally used as a nervous system stimulant. It works as a tonic for the reproductive organs and it can easily help to improve the sex drive in women.

A loss of sex drive in women usually stems from health related conditions. Yet, that does not mean that there is not help out there. A women's libido enhancer in the form of a supplement with any of these types of herbs in it may be really helpful and a safe alternative as well.

source: http://www.yourbodycanheal.com/

What Causes the Loss of Sex Drive in Women?

The loss of sex drive in women is something that most women will worry and wonder about. What happened? Why am I not interested anymore? While it is frustrating, the loss of sex drive in women usually stems from several health concerns. In most cases, these things can be treated to help your sexual life get back to normal… One option is to consider a women’s libido enhancer but we will talk about this in just a minute.

The first thing to understand is what causes the loss of sex drive in woman. While it is necessary to speak to a doctor to make the final determination here are possible causes of reduced libido:

· Hormonal imbalance. There are many types of things that can be imbalanced here including progesterone. Progesterone is responsible for your libido but can fall quite low during pre-menopause.

· Fatigue. Of course you can see that there is a real connection here. One of the most common reasons for fatigue is the fact that there is another hormonal imbalance or there is poor nutrition coming into the body.

· Adrenal exhaustion can also be a factor that causes the hormones to go the wrong direction. It can be caused by medical menopause occurrences.

· Stress, depression, and even child birth are also contributing factors to the lack of sex drive that women have. These situations may not be as easy to fix, but they are common signs of something being wrong.

source: http://www.yourbodycanheal.com/